By redpanda On July 4th, 2009

Some days I feel as if I am going to fall apart. I have been not what I would call the perfect wife but a damn sight better than I have been and all I feel is lost and alone at times. I hate being criticised. I hate days where like today it has been hot and sticky and its given me a headache. My throat feels like the bottom of a bird cage and is very sore. Most of all I hate falling asleep in the car when we go out, but sometimes I can’t help it. May be its regression to being a baby and the need to sleep. I have days where I could fall asleep at my desk, I can fall asleep again within half an hour of getting up but can I sleep at night????????????? Not always though it has been better. What has not helped is it has been time of the month the last few days and that takes everything out of me. Sometimes all I want to do is cry. Its as if I don’t then this depression will not leave my system. Even when there is nothing wrong sometimes I feel like this. I feel I am becoming a better person. Its a long haul though. The alcohol has gone out the window and I live on diet coke and flavoured water.

I am sort of mastering the art of Facebook. Can anyone tell me what Farm Town is though as I have received a gift and have to return one and don’t have a clue what it is about. I now have 5 friends on there. Its a good way of keeping in touch with people which is why I signed up. As they say its good to talk. I find it easier to talk in an email or text than face to face a lot of the time.

Busy week for Ryan next week with two school trips, sports day and reports coming out. He is off to Monkeyworld (school have adopted a monkey and he has been selected for the visit) and Moors Valley Country Park with the ‘Calm Corner’ group. Bless him he had a better social life than I do……………….

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